In Twelfth Night, Shakespeare wrote, “some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon ’em”.  I sometimes think of this when mountain biking, mainly because when it comes to mountain biking, I wasn’t born great, I haven’t achieved greatness and I’m fairly certain that at no point have I had greatness thrust upon me.  Unless you count that time I accidentally got fat air on a tabletop on Glentress blue.

There have been a few occasions where we’ve taken people new to mountain biking out.  Some struggle with it, nervously making their way across the bumpy singletrack and stopping before every feature.  Others fly around as if they’ve been riding all of their lives.

I fell more into the first camp.  It’s taken me a loooong time to get where I am now, and I am geniunely chuffed with my progress.  In 2007 I could barely  ride a bike full stop, and now I’m getting around a red route in about an hour.  Yay me!

Last week I volunteered to show a new rider over Cannock Chase.  She wanted to get into mountain biking, but was worried about not being able to find the route and getting lost.  As it turned out, that was all she needed to be worried about.  Fitness-wise, she pretty much kicked my ass, and despite not having the best of bikes, cheerfully rode all of the Follow the Dog without any issue.  She went straight in over the rock and bridge obstacle at the start, straight over the rocky steps on the exit from two and the Stegosaur, over the boardwalk, and probably would have ridden Werewolf Drop if she’d had a slightly more competent guide.  She was definitely considering it on the second lap.  Yes, she did two laps, and is now looking at getting a new bike.  Job’s a good ‘un! \o/

Sometimes it does make me wonder if I’m just genetically a bit wrong for mountain biking.  I definitely get the fear a lot, sometimes even on stuff I’ve ridden plenty of times before.  I spent the hour before my first night lap at Sleepless in the Saddle sobbing uncontrollably.  I didn’t ride the Monkey trail at all last year.  But I do enjoy mountain biking despite being a bit naff at it, and I’d rather be a bit more fearful and cautious than pushing myself beyond my capabilities and ended up injured and unable to ride.  And it’s nice helping people get into mountain biking… even if they manage in one ride what it’s taken you nearly five years to achieve.  Derp.

The following day it was Mr Toast’s turn to ride, so I took t’boy for a walk.  On the way we visited the trail builders, who are working feverishly on the end of Follow the Dog.  Dave of Clan Pearson was helping get the rockery down on the rollers, which will stop them from being eroded and provide a nice comfy landing for anyone who comes off.

The upper end of the repairs are also looking good, although the two steps are looking terrifying now – althought they’ve not changed in height.  Normally when I look at an obstacle from the other side and on foot, I think, “Oh, that actually looks really easy”.  Not so with the steps.  Hopefully I’ll still have the ovarian fortitude to tackle them when they’re re-opened!

So despite threatening to go to Coed-y-Brenin for three years, on Saturday we found ourselves with the good crew of Chase Trails over Nant-yr-Arian.  This was highly unusual, as it involved me getting out of bed before 11am on a Saturday.  Had to get up at 6am, to be exact, which is practically the middle of the night.

We sallied forth in the bleak autumny weather… oh no, wait, it was blue skies and 26 degrees.  I don’t know what’s going on with the weather, but I’m not complaining.  It was fantastic.

Approaching Nant-y-Arian a few things became clear.  One, the locals in the surrounding villages really don’t like pylons or wind turbines.  Two, despite the presence of nearby turbines, red kites clearly don’t give a crap.  Three, Red Kites are ruddy huge.  Four… the hills are also quite large.

After purchasing the obligatory souvenir for the Map of Joy (see the following post…), it was off up the Summit Trail.  There was the expected long fireroad climb at the start, then we were off down the Italian Job.  I gloriously minced down the trail.  I believe I’ve mentioned before that I’m not a morning person, so suddenly being faced with being on a large hill after getting up at six and driving for three hours and it not even being past noon was more than my tiny brain could cope with.  The trail is sturdy and not overly technical, but OMG IT’S ON A HILL!  What if I fall off the side and fall to my death?  Mr Toast can’t drive, how will he get home?  So off I hopped at the slightest obstacle, whimpering internally.  And externally.  Step up?  Do not want.  No, I don’t care if it’s only three inches high, there’s a root after it – what if I hit the root AND DIE?  Rocky steps?  No, I don’t care if they’re comparable to the steps on Tackaroo, I can do those but these ones are MADE OF ROCK!  What if I faceplant?  It’s only the first section!  I’ll spoil it for everybody!

Obviously everyone else was fine, with most of the boys throwing themselves over an optional feature for filming pleasure.  Sadly our little point and click camera struggles with the sheer majesty of Gnar, so most of the action shots came out blurry.

Nant-yr-Arian is very pretty.  Lots of nice views, and quite a variety too – woodland, moorland, hills, lakes.  Why, just look at this attractive group of folk enjoying the scenery.

I generally forget that Mr Toast is quite tall.  Photos like this remind me.

There’s quite a lot of fireroad from one section of singletrack to another, the one leading to Mark of Zorro being quite loose and Peak Districty.  I’m never comfortable with these kinds of trails as I don’t feel even remotely happy going down them with any speed, but the slower you go the more shaky it feels.  Plus there are distractions.  Not to sound too Welsh, but there are really pretty sheep around here – perfectly white and fluffy, very posh looking.  However, they do also look a bit Black Metal.  Let’s look at the evidence.

Deathly pallor?  Black eyes and mouth? Yes, there’s no doubt about it.  Nanty sheep are proper grim and frostbitten, and liable to start singing about Satan any minute now.

Moving swiftly on (or not so swiftly, it was a bit hilly) we hit the Mark of Zorro.  This section was a huge amount of fun – I perhaps enjoyed it so much as I was finally getting into the swing of things, plus going through the woods meant that everything was under a nice carpet of friendly pine needles.  Emerged with a huge grin on my face… until we hit The Leg Burner.  The Leg Burner isn’t steep, and it’s in a straight line…but, by Zeus, does it outstay its welcome. There’s a brief but ultimately pointless respite in the form of Emmanuelle, which most of the locals dismissed as being not worth the diversion.    On the plus side, when you get to the top there’s a viewpoint with a nice mosiac that says how humans ‘burrowed for silver and lead’.   I did take some pictures, but they don’t really do it justice.

Eventually you end up at Drunken Druid, which has its moments of joy but also a horrible incline that I nearly made it up but ultimately failed. The end of it has a few rock gardens that I rode quite happily… well, I didn’t die… which left me pondering if I could manage the three on the Monkey.  I’ve done the second one once, really need to get around to riding the Monkey again…

High as a Kite winds through the trees back to the Forestry centre, and I rode it relatively speedily, albeit with a few squeals.  Roots, you see.

After a ham sandwich and a cup of tea, it was time for round two, this time tackling the Pendam trail.  Pendam takes in some of the Summit sections, adds a few of its own but misses out on The Leg Burner and is generally a bit shorter and less demanding.  By this time I was fairly comfortable with the notion of hilly death, and rode all of The Italian Job (with the exception of the crap step up).  I realised that my comrades were filming my efforts, so I took comfort in the fact that even if I messed it up and faceplanted, at least Chase Trails could get £250 from You’ve Been Framed.  Fortunately (or not for Chase Trails) I didn’t mess up – my weight was a bit far forward so I didn’t exactly ride it gracefully, but I never felt unbalanced or like I was going to come off.  Which was nice.

The main diversion of Pendam was by the lake, where it goes its own way from The Summit Trail to Hippity Hop, The Spine and The Camel’s Hump.  Passing the lake was thoroghly entertaining, as by this time a group of enterprising young lads had strapped various buoyant items to cheap bikes and were proceeding to launch themselves into the lake off a ramp.  As one of our group remarked, Jackass has a lot to answer for.  Hippity Hop was good fun, lots of jumps (as you’d expect from the name), as was The Spine.  Wasn’t quite as keen on the Camel’s Hump as it was a bit looser, and I’m a massive lamer. There was the tail end of the climb back up to Drunken Druid, and the end was the same as the Summit Trail.

Knees played up slightly on the climbs, but my biggest issue was the descents.   After a short while, I had the same burning sensation in my left leg that I had at Glentress.  I don’t know whether it’s a matter of bad positioning (the pain varies between being right above my knee to being further up my thigh depending on where I have my weight), or whether they just need building up.

I really enjoyed Nanty, and felt it was well worth the drive.  Not too technical, but enough to keep it interesting, particularly if you’re going fast.  There’s a lot of fireroad and bridleway, but I think that with the Chase we’re massively spoilt in that respect – there’s really not a lot of non-singletrack stuff on FtD.  Normally if there’s a lot of climbing or fireroad sections I get a bit stroppy and feel like it wasn’t really worth it (hello Mabie), but Nanty’s singletrack sections were thoroughly good fun.  Everyone was very friendly too, even the guy who’d managed to snap a crank (not a euphemism) was still smiling.

Got back home at nine in the evening, had a bath and a bowl of Shreddies, then promptly passed out for 12 hours.  Awoke on Sunday with my knees, thighs, arms and back killing me.  Would I do it again?  Definitely!

Ride: Nant yr Arian

Trail: The Summit (morning), Pendam (afternoon)

Highlights:  Not dying after The Leg Burner, doing the Italian Job properly 2nd time around

Bad bits:  Leg pain. Inability to do hairpin corners.

Post ride food snaffled: Ham sandwich, crisps, salad, tea (between trails)

Good dogs seen: Junior German Shepherd, some fluffy giant Pomeranian…thing.

Poor, poor, Professor. It’s been nearly a month since we’ve been to the Chase due to a fairly life changing event – we’re buying a house! This is awesome, but quite time consuming, so our weekends have been filled with house viewing, form filling, and efforts to destroy the weeds that are triffiding over the garden of our current house.

So today was our first ride in ages. I actually felt a bit queasy and nervous going out, as if either Follow the Dog had gotten harder in our absence, or as if I’d forgotten how to ride a bike. I needn’t have worried though – I actually felt really comfortable and confident, and despite the Chase Trails pixies having been busy the planned spike-filled death pit hasn’t been built yet. I think having a break has actually done my legs some good, I didn’t have any knee or muscle pain and could easily get out of the saddle throughout the ride.

It was good to see a lot of beginners and families out on the trail. It was particularly impressive to see tiny children quite happily tackling the Stegosaur with aplomb. I have to admit, I was also impressed by a dad and his little lad doing section ten. Not only was the tiny lad doing a decent pace, but his dad managed to do pretty much the entire section whilst talking on his mobile phone. I suppose I should have been appalled by his lack of consideration for health and safety, but… he rode the entire section one-handed, whilst holding a conversation on his phone. Like I said… impressive.

Only sour note of the ride was going into the berms just before Werewolf. A rider came barrelling behind me and yelled, “MOVE”. I pulled over just before the last couple of turns before the drop, and the rider went past without so much as a “Thank you”… then proceeded to hop off his bike at Werewolf and walk down. Sir, you are a terrible human being.

Anyhoo, course of action for the next few weeks:

Move house!

But keep riding!

Get my ass out of bed before 11am on a Sunday and help with trail building, particularly now there are Chicken Runs under construction!

Vote for Chase Trails in the lottery awards

But for now, I’m watching The Day After Tomorrow. It kind of sucks.